


Pros and Cons

by I May Age Regress (shnuffeluv)



Series: The (Mis)Adventures of Baby Dee and Papa Logan [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders is an Asshole, Caring Logic | Logan Sanders, Gen, Men Crying, Neglect, Non-Sexual Age Play, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders, unintentional neglect
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-05
Updated: 2019-09-05
Packaged: 2020-10-10 05:36:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20522807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shnuffeluv/pseuds/I%20May%20Age%20Regress
Summary: It's been a while since Logan has been able to help Deceit when regressed, but that's okay. Dee doesn't need him, right? He can handle himself...right? Well, at least until Remus comes along...





	Pros and Cons

Dee was exhausted. He didn't want to admit it, and he didn't want to admit that he was small, either, because that would just create more problems. He was scared of what might happen if the others found out he was little, so he couldn't reach out to them, Remus _definitely_ wasn't an option, and Logan...well, Logan had been busy for weeks.

It wasn't like Dee blamed Logan or anything. After all, with the callback and planning videos and editing and making sure that Thomas was taking care of himself, Logan had a lot on his plate. But it didn't leave Logan with much, if any, free time. And Dee didn't want to use up what little free time Logan had by being little and needy for an hour or two.

Occasionally, they would run into each other in the Mind Palace, as Logan was off to research something, or Deceit wanted to talk to Roman, or if both of them happened to be getting something to drink or eat at the same time. But then there was nothing more than a nod of acknowledgement, a simple _hey_ or even just a neutral glance spared between the two. Dee knew he was desperate when he had dropped this morning without warning, but Logan was busy helping Thomas research for a new video, so he stayed in his room with his baby blanket and stuffed elephant and tried to pretend that being alone didn't bother him.

That might have been the biggest lie he ever told, though. He was sniffling and crying and wishing that he could just have someone to help him with this, but he knew that was asking the impossible. He hugged his elephant and sucked on the ear of it, which was becoming admittedly a little threadbare. He needed--no, wanted his Papa, he corrected himself. He didn't _need_ Papa in order to be little, and he didn't _need_ Papa to help him. It was a bonus, true, but he wasn't going to say that he needed Papa, when clearly, he could continue on his own.

There was a knock on his door, and Dee hurriedly shoved his elephant and blanket into their hiding spots under the bed and calmly walked over to the door, forcing himself to age up just long enough to deal with whatever was on the other side. He inwardly cringed when he opened the door to find Remus on the other side. "Oh, good, you're up!" Remus exclaimed. "You hadn't left your room yet at all today, and I was wondering if you were even awake!"

"What do you want, Remus?" Deceit sighed, leaning against his door frame.

Remus looked Deceit over once, before grinning wide and Deceit knew he was in trouble. "Oh! Did I interrupt the little baby's nap? Or was it his playtime? Either way, I'm sure that you were having _way_ more fun alone than with me or you-know-who. You never did like us much when you got little, did you?"

"Well, I wonder why that could be, considering the both of you relentlessly mocked me for it," Deceit hissed. "Just say what you want and get it over with."

"I want a witness!" Remus exclaimed. "I'm going to experiment with fire in the Common Room and I wanted someone to testify that fires _do_ burn different colors! Or at the very least, I want to make something blow up to see what happens."

"Remus, no," Deceit warned. "That's a _terrible_ idea!"

"I _know_ it's a brilliant idea, my dear, I _thought_ of it after all! No need to lie to your friend The Duke, remember?" Remus said, a wicked grin splitting his face.

"Remus--!" Deceit began to protest, but Remus was already running down the hall. Deceit sighed, locking his bedroom door behind him and running after Remus, hoping that he could stop the fires before Remus started setting them. "Remus! Get back here!"

But Deceit had no luck in getting Remus to listen to him. In fact, he barely got to the Common Room in time to watch Remus take a lighter to what was no doubt a highly flammable substance. There was a loud _bang_ and a shockwave that sent Deceit flying backwards into the wall, causing tears to come to his eyes in pain. When he tried to speak, he found that the wind had gotten knocked out of him. The other sides were rushing to the Common Room, exclaiming about the mess that it was, and Remus just stood in the center of it, covered head to toe in black soot like a cartoon character, before he said, "So _that's_ what happens when you try to make something explode in the Mind Palace."

"You...set an _explosion--?!"_ Virgil cut himself short, and turned to Deceit. "Why did you _let him do this?!"_

"I was _trying_ to stop him!" Deceit snapped.

Virgil scoffed. "And you did a pretty bang-up job of it," he snapped, sarcasm dripping from every word.

Deceit felt something in him hurt at that statement, and he tried to not let it get to him. Remus picked up on it, however, because his eyes lit up with glee. "Oh, look at that!" he exclaimed. "Something's going on with the little snake over there!"

"Don't," Deceit warned.

"What? I'm just pointing out what everyone can see if they know where to look," Remus said, wiggling back and forth where he stood.

"Don't!" Deceit snapped, crossing his arms with his fingers digging into his biceps.

"No, let's hear him out," Virgil said, glaring at Deceit. "After all, you never listen to _me_ when I tell you to stop."

Deceit could feel himself slipping, and fast. He knew that Virgil was in the dark about Deceit regressing, as he had only slipped up after Virgil starting making an attempt to be with the Light Sides and the others had shoved him out of their group. If this came out, he knew that Virgil would never let him live it down. And the others...well, he'd lose whatever power and respect he had in their eyes. That was not an option. "Remus, I swear--"

Remus laughed and Deceit felt heat build up in his cheeks. He wasn't going to be able to get Remus to shut up about this. "Oh, you're so cute when you try to keep secrets, but you know that sooner or later, everything comes out, doesn't it?"

Dee was shaking at this point, and he knew that any second he was going to start crying..._again._ Why could he never grow out of that?! Everyone else could keep their emotions somewhat in check if worst came to worst. Even _Patton_ was learning healthy releases for his emotions. But Dee couldn't stop this even if he tried...because he _had_ tried. Repeatedly.

Logan rose up in the Mind Palace and looked around, bemused. "Would someone care to explain to me what's going on?" he asked.

"Oh, we're just getting to the juicy bits about our little snake's private life!" Remus exclaimed.

Logan glanced to Dee, and Dee tried to put on a brave face, to convince everyone around him that this wasn't a matter of life and death. But Logan wasn't falling for it, and he doubted anyone else was either. "Remus, whatever Deceit does in his private life is just that. Private. We shouldn't insist on bringing any of his secrets to light, no matter how twisted or mundane they may be."

Remus gasped, and brought his hands to his mouth. "You _know!"_ he crowed. "Oh, this is too good! Deceit, you never told me that Logan knew about your..._little_ secret!"

"Why would anyone need to know that except me and...and Logan?!" Dee snapped. He had to stop himself from saying Papa. But that would have gone over terribly, so luckily he caught himself just in time. "If he knows, it's no one else's business!"

"Oh, but don't you know? The best way to keep a secret is to tell no one! The second you let it slip, everyone seems to know, don't they? And you know what's going to happen when this secret comes to light," Remus gloated.

Dee blinked as his tears finally started to fall. He was shaking and crying and he knew that it didn't matter if the others knew or not. Whatever illusion of power he had held was completely gone. "Fine. Tell them for all I care!" Dee shouted. "It's not like it matters anymore!"

Remus pouted. "Now where's the fun in telling them if you don't care about them being told about it? The best part is when the person's whole world shatters because of their secret!"

"It's not like it matters," Dee repeated. "They hardly think of me as scary anyway..."

"What is it?! What's this secret that everyone seems to know about?!" Virgil snapped.

"Oh! It's--"

"--None of your business. Or Remus' for that matter," Logan cut Remus off. "If Dee doesn't want to share it, he shouldn't have to."

Remus laughed. "Oh, you even have a cute little nickname for him, Logan! You got attached! What, does he call you 'Mommy' and run to you whenever something doesn't go his way?"

Dee balled his hands into fists and strode over to Remus, socking him in the jaw. "Shut up!" Deceit bellowed. "Shut up, shut up, just _shut up!_ No one likes you, no one wants you here! You just destroy any good thing you see! And you don't even care about how other people might feel about it!"

Logan was wrapping his arms around Dee in a hug and pulling him away from Remus. "Dee, stop," he said, calm but firm. "That's not going to get you anywhere but in more trouble."

Dee struggled against Logan's arms, even though he really didn't want to, even though this might have been the first time in weeks he had been hugged. He was sobbing, trying to get back to Remus to ensure he stayed shut up, but Logan wasn't letting go.

Remus touched at his jaw and winced. "That was admittedly a good shot," Remus said. "But it's still only the result of a baby's tantrum, so I don't think it's really _that_ impressive."

"I'm not a baby!" Dee exclaimed, tears still falling like fire down his face. "I'm not!"

Remus laughed. "Oh, that has to be the biggest lie you've ever told, little snake. And you know it's wrong to lie to the adults, right?"

Virgil had a deep frown etched in his face, his eyes moving back and forth over the floor like he was trying to figure out a difficult math problem. Patton and Roman just looked beyond confused. "Why are you talking to him like a kid?" Patton asked. "Like, I might call Roman and Virgil 'kiddo' but they're not _actually_ children."

Virgil gasped and Dee went limp in Logan's arms, knowing it was no use trying to hide his secret anymore. "No, it can't be!" Virgil exclaimed. "He regresses? Deceit _regresses?!"_

Dee hid as best as he could in Logan's shirt as Virgil started to laugh. "Ooh, karma's a bitch, isn't it?!" he crowed. "Only this is a _way_ worse secret than any that you've ever given out about me before!"

"Virgil, that's enough," Logan said, turning to him and leveling him with a glare.

"It _is_ funny, though!" Virgil exclaimed. "Come on, he's bawling like a baby!"

"Yes, because you _and_ Remus _hurt him!"_ Logan snapped. "That is not something to laugh at, or be proud of!"

Dee continued to cry into Logan's shirt. He needed some time, just a minute to catch his breath and grab the shreds of his dignity, and retreat to his room and lick his wounds. "Papa fix?" he asked, voice impossibly small.

"I'm trying, Dee," Logan murmured, continuing to glare at Virgil. "Believe me when I say I'm trying."

Dee shimmied underneath Logan's grip until he was somewhat standing. "Can you let go?"

"Are you going to deck Remus again?" Logan asked.

"No...I'm gonna go to my room," Dee said.

"We could always go to mine," Logan offered. "If you want company, or if you want to see the stars?"

"Nuh-uh...you hafta help Thomas," Dee mumbled. "I can be by myself."

Logan frowned. "Helping Thomas can wait for half an hour, Dee. It can wait however long it takes for you to feel calm again."

"It didn't before...?" Dee said, but his voice rose like a question.

"What do you mean? Of course it does, it always has," Logan said.

Dee shook his head, frowning. "No...you haven't...you haven't been around for the past couple weeks. I've been in my room on my own."

Logan frowned, before horror started to form on his face. Remus yawned loudly. "Fascinating as this is to watch, I'd much rather see the baby continue to cry, then have you two work out your issues where everyone can see. It's much funnier to see him sobbing with his baby blanket."

"He has a what?!" Virgil snickered.

"He does, it has little cartoon snakes on it, along with a bunch of other safari animals," Remus informed him. "I found it under his bed one day."

Virgil cackled and Dee turned red again. "I...I can't...I don't..." Dee stammered. "I'm sorry..." He broke free of Logan's grip by force, turned tail, and ran back to his room, flinging the door open before shutting it with his whole body. He locked it and prayed that none of the others would try to get in. He grabbed his elephant and his blanket, and felt loathing crash over him like a tsunami. He shouldn't need this, he shouldn't! None of the others did, so why was he the one who had to be cursed with this?!

He was tempted to take a pair of scissors to both items, but he knew he wouldn't be able to bear it when he needed their comfort and they were no longer there. He climbed onto his bed, wrapped his blanket around his shoulders and sucked on his elephant's ear, trying to breathe evenly enough that he could conceivably call himself calm. It wasn't working very well, not that it ever really did when he got worked up while he was little.

Curling up in a ball on his bed, he quickly fell asleep for some time. When he woke next, it was to frantic knocking at his bedroom door. "Dee? Dee, please, are you in there?" Logan called through the wood.

Dee got up, grumbling and rubbing one of his eyes as he unlocked the door and looked at Logan. "What do you want," he said, voice flat and free of any emotion or energy.

"Did you fall asleep?" Logan asked.

Dee nodded, yawning. "'S probably good that you woke me up, though," he sighed. "Are the others still laughing?"

"No," Logan said. "I gave Virgil a severe dressing down after you ran to your room, and I gave Remus a warning that if he valued his continued existence, he would not be revealing anything else about you. If they know what's good for them, they won't bother you about it."

Dee nibbled on his thumb and looked at Logan. "Is that why you're here? To tell me about that?"

Logan shook his head. "Actually, I'm here to talk to you about what _you_ said today. I was aware it had been a while since you had regressed, with me around or not. What I wasn't aware of, however, was that it may be damaging to you. I apologize profusely for not talking to you more over the past few weeks. I have had a lot going on, and haven't been available to help you, but I'm available now, and I wish to make up for lost time, if that's acceptable to you?"

Dee slowly nodded and let Logan in. Immediately, Logan zeroed in on the blanket and elephant on the bed. "I take it that blanket is what Remus was talking about?"

"Yeah," Dee said softly. "The elephant is Bernard. I love him lots. Maybe too much, 'cause he's looked a little worn out recently."

Logan smiled, softly and with a touch of regret. "I had no idea you had these," he said. "But I like them. It's rather fitting."

Dee shifted where he stood before going over to his bed and hugging Bernard close to his chest. "Sorry about today," he said, looking away, eyes already blurring with more tears. "I couldn't stop Remus, and then he just kept talking and talking, and I just...I don't know. I got angry."

"It happens, Dee," Logan said. "It's okay to be angry, but you shouldn't lash out as a result of it. Understand?"

Dee nodded. He yawned. "Mm. Still tired."

"Do you think you could stay awake for a while longer? I have a surprise for you," Logan said.

"A surprise?" Dee repeated. "What kind of surprise?"

"A secret surprise," Logan said with a wink.

"Papa! That's not fair!" Dee exclaimed.

There was a knock at the door, and Dee curled in on himself. "Who's that?"

"Your surprise," Logan said, opening the door to reveal Patton and Roman.

Patton walked in first, offering Dee a wave. "Hey, Dee. Are you feeling any better?"

Dee nodded. "Lil bit," he mumbled.

Roman came in next, bounding over and leaping onto Deceit's bed, causing him to go airborne and yelp. "Ro, what did I _just_ tell you about running?!" Patton asked.

"Sorry," Roman said to Patton. "Got excited." He turned to Dee. "Hey! So, you regress too?"

Dee's brain screeched to a halt. "I--what--too?!" he asked.

Roman nodded. "Yeah! Uncle Logan says you're younger than I am, though. I'm like, four."

"Oh," Dee said. "I'm, like...uh..." He held up two fingers. "Yeah. This many."

"Oh!" Roman exclaimed. "You're really little! No wonder you got worked up. If you haven't had a chance to regress it's just been waiting for a moment to get loose."

Dee nodded. He looked to Logan and Patton, who were watching them fondly. "So...uh...Patton takes care of you?" Dee asked.

"Hm? Yeah! Dad's great at being a dad!" Roman said. "Even if he does say I can't run indoors."

Dee smiled a little. "Papa and I mostly cuddle," he said. "I don't do running lots."

"Oh! Have you ever gone on adventures in the Imagination when you're little?! It's super cool!" Roman said. "And none of the stuff hurts you for real, so the worst it can be is a little scary if the Dragon Witch gets too close!"

"I...didn't know that," Dee managed to say. He was trying to follow Roman's train of thought, but it felt like chasing after a caffeinated jackrabbit.

"Hey, Roman? You're overwhelming Dee a little bit. Why don't you get to the surprise?" Logan prompted.

"Oh! Yeah!" Roman exclaimed. "Dee, do you want to be my playmate?"

Dee blinked. "You'd...want me to play with you?"

"Well, duh!" Roman exclaimed. "You're not a bad guy! You're not trying to hurt Thomas, right?"

"I would _never_ hurt Thomas!" Dee exclaimed, scandalized by the thought.

"Then you can play with me!" Roman exclaimed. "And Dad, too, if he decides he wants to play with us."

Dee smiled. Soft, uncertain, but also oh-so-hopeful. "I'd like that a lot," he said.

Roman cheered and Dee giggled, hiding his face in his elephant. "I was hoping to go in the Imagination and blow bubbles the size of your head today! You can join me and Dad, if you want?" Roman offered.

Dee's jaw dropped open and he turned to Logan, who was grinning. "Yes, I'll be there too if you want to go."

"I'd love to go!" Dee exclaimed.

"Yay!" Roman cheered, standing up. "Come on, we can figure out what colors the bubbles can be as we head over there."

"Let's make them rainbow!" Dee exclaimed, running alongside Roman as they made their way to the Imagination.

"Ro! Dee! Slow down!" Patton called after them.

Roman and Dee slowed down just a little bit, but they were still chatting and laughing up a storm. Dee was happy that something good came out of the day, even if he had been stressed. And Logan was gonna try and help him more, probably, and he and Roman could play, and if Logan wasn't around he might be able to go to Patton, and...yeah. Today was a good day.

**Author's Note:**

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